Blessed Assurance

A meditation upon Steve Lawson, Pete Enns, and the Cross of Christ

I know a lot of you were really longing for a pet update—hardy har har—so I just wanted to say that having six animals and six, basically, grown children all in one household is the dream I could have never imagined. Just now I am flanked by a large friendly cat and a small wicked puppy. There is an angry dog curled up in his bed who growls every now and then, just to be sure. Beside him the largest of the six beasts is sleeping the sleep of the ignorant but guilty. In the attic is Lucy the cat who won’t come down here, and yet who wishes we would all go up there.

It is also one of those rare—and fleeting—days where all the “children” are at home. Every single person has headphones in. Four of the six are doing school work, one is hassling everyone to do wedding tasks, and one is gazing into the middle distance. And, for the record, my domestic arrangments are just as chaotic as when I only had three animals and everyone was under the age of ten. If you had told me that in another ten years, my house would be more of a wreck, not less, I would have wept.

The thing about life, really, is that you never get a foothold. Just as soon as you count yourself comfortable and capable, something happens to upend it all. And that “something” could be anything. It could be happy like a child arranging a wedding, or it could be tragic like just suddenly not being able to cope anymore and deciding to throw over long-standing friendly associations because “something” has got to give. It could be wonderful news about a job or the awful revelation that the biopsy you really hoped would be negative turned out to be “positive.” It could be some perplexing conundrum putting itself right or it could be a grief that suddenly engulfs you. The troubling thing is that you never know. You arrange yourself to be happy, but there are no guarantees that, at the crucial moment, the thing you most hope for won’t slip through your fingers.

That is the thought I had as I read Steven Lawson’s long Tweet of Repentance. Here it is:

It is with a shattered heart that I write this letter. I have sinned grievously against the Lord, against my wife, my family, and against countless numbers of you by having a sinful relationship with a woman not my wife. I am deeply broken that I have betrayed and deceived my wife, devastated my children, brought shame to the name of Christ, reproach upon His church, and harm to many ministries. You may wonder why I have been silent and largely invisible since the news of my sin became known. I have needed the time to search my own soul to determine that my repentance is real. I alone am responsible for my sin. I have confessed my sin to the Lord, to my wife, and my family, and have repented of it. I have spent the past months searching my heart to discover the roots of my sin and mortifying them by the grace of God. I hate my sin, weep over my sin, and have turned from it. My sin carries enormous consequences, and I will be living with those for the rest of my life. Over the years, many have looked to me for spiritual guidance, and I have failed you. I beg for your forgiveness. I have been undergoing extensive counseling for the last five months to face the hard questions I need to address. I have dealt with sin issues that have been painfully exposed in my heart. I have submitted myself in weekly accountability to two pastors and to the elders of a local congregation, who have shepherded my soul. I am also under the oversight of an accountability team who monitor my progress and give me wise counsel in the decisions I have to make. I am growing in grace, reading and absorbing the Word of God, putting it into practice, praying, and meeting with other believers. I am involved in the life of the church, attending and participating in prayer meetings, Sunday school, the worship service, and taking communion weekly. I am being fed the Word in the mid-week Bible study. Please pray for my spiritual growth into Christlikeness as I follow Him moment by moment during this recovery season. I am grateful for the unmerited grace of God in the gospel to extend His full forgiveness to me. Again, I ask for your forgiveness as well. While I continue to do the hard work of soul-searching repentance, I do not intend to make further public comments for the foreseeable future. Please pray for the Lord’s mercy and grace as I seek to make right the deeply wrong sins I have committed against my wife and family, and that in His time and way He will bring about redemption and restoration in our marriage, for His glory. Steven Lawson 3:56 PM · Mar 12, 2025

Some people on the X app do not believe what is written here and are being fairly snarky about it. But, to me, this sounds more Christian than many posts I encounter on X. It is the cry from the depths of humiliation of every person who has ever discovered himself in a wretched condition, brought about by his own doing.

My supreme hope is that Dr. Lawson will quietly fade from the public sphere and that we will someday meet him in heaven, that bright kingdom where we find we are each able to stand upright, by the blood of the lamb, in the presence of the King.

It is a very different kind of statement than I am used to seeing.